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When Anita prepared for the birth of her first child, she had a clear goal in mind—no epidural. The idea of having a needle inserted into her spine felt terrifying to her, but beyond that, she wanted to maintain as much control as possible over her labor experience. She made a firm decision to pursue a natural birth, even though it was her first child, and opted for a hospital birth with the support of a labor coach, commonly known as a doula.

Why I opted for an Unmedicated Birth

My goal going into having a child was to avoid an epidural at all costs. The thought of having a needle put in my spine was, to say the least, daunting. I also didn’t like the idea that childbirth could last longer with an epidural, and that I wouldn’t be able to control when the baby came out. On top of that, I’d heard doctors are much quicker to give episiotomies when you can’t feel anything—something I definitely wanted to avoid.

Since I wanted a natural birth but also planned to deliver in a hospital, my husband and I decided to hire labor coaches—doulas. I can’t recommend them enough. Sure, it’s an extra cost, but the help and support they provided during the birthing process was priceless. With them, I didn’t have to wait for a nurse to check on me and tell me how things were progressing. They were there through every contraction, helping me with my breathing and guiding me through the pushing phase. The doctor only shows up when the baby is crowning, so having the doulas there made me feel supported the entire time.

One thing I quickly realized is that relying on your spouse for help isn’t really an option—they honestly have no idea what’s going on, and it’s not their fault! My doula was the one keeping me focused. After certain contractions, she would say things like, ‘If you can get through that one, you can get through another.’ That kind of encouragement kept me going, especially when it got tough.

The pain, in the grand scheme of things, is temporary. For me, it was all about focus. Like an endurance run, I concentrated on a single spot on the wall and just breathed through it. The pain wasn’t constant—it came in waves. If I could get through one, I knew I could get through the next.

And here's a little trick I used to motivate myself: I brought along a treat—a pack of Oreos—as a reward for when everything was done. Knowing I had those Oreos waiting for me at the end was a surprisingly comforting thought.

Advice for Wanting Unmedicated Childbirth

If you're hoping to have a natural childbirth, it’s essential to create a plan of action ahead of time with your support person. Discuss your preferences and how they can assist you during labor, but also remember that childbirth is unpredictable. A lot can happen that you can’t foresee or control, and things may not go exactly as planned. At the end of the day, your health and your baby’s health are the top priorities, so it's important to stay flexible and open to changes. A birth plan is a guide, not a rigid rulebook, and adapting when necessary is part of the journey.

If you find that you need an epidural to get through labor, that’s absolutely okay—don’t ever view yourself as weak or less than for making that choice. Childbirth is incredibly challenging, and no matter how you do it, bringing a baby into the world is a huge accomplishment. Every birth experience is different, and what matters most is doing what’s best for you and your baby. There’s no “right” way to give birth—just the way that works for you.